TIPS on How to Talk With Your Children about Substances and Gambling part 5

Over the next 5 weeks we are going to be posting 1 tip a week on how to discuss substance use and gambling with your kids.

Tip #5 Family History Matters-.

 The vulnerability to developing a gambling or substance use disorder is passed generationally through biology. Exposure to addictive tendencies in the home is also a large risk factor. Both nature and nurture play a role in a person developing an addiction. And if there is family history, with a parent, grandparent, or aunt/uncle, this could be a risk factor as well. “While we know from studies that the genetic heritability of addiction is strong, it is also complex, passed on through a series of genes and generally not limited to a single substance.”(Levy and Sundaram) Basically, if  children have a family member with one addiction, the higher chance they have of developing an addiction. It isn’t the substance that is passed down, but the risk that is. The way to combat this is to have honest discussions about unhealthy substance use, addiction, and the family risk of substance use disorders. These conversations can help provide teens a good, solid reason for making the smart decision not to start using in the first place.

Biology Matters. Own Your History

***Harvard Health Blog

August 16, 2018

By Sharon Levy, MD, MPH, Contributor, and

Siva Sundaram, BA, Contributor

TIPS ON HOW TO TALK WITH YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT SUBSTANCES AND GAMBLING PART 4

Over the next 5 weeks we are going to be posting 1 tip a week on how to discuss substance use and gambling with your kids.

Tip # 4 “How to Intervene”.  ***

Connecting with children on the topic of substance use and other addictions like gambling can be tricky. The goal is to encourage transparency and trust, while also wanting to articulate clear messages that help to keep them safe. Teens who engage in substance use or other addictive behaviors regularly and/or who have had a consequence associated with addictive behaviors may be on course for developing a substance use disorder. A professional assessment is the best place to start. You can find a detailed list of warnings signs on the NYS Office of Addiction Supports and Services website. If an assessment is needed, you can start with your pediatrician, who can help refer you to a specialist as necessary.

Seek to Intervene

Please come back next week for tip # 5 in talking with your children which is, “How Family Plays a Role”

***Harvard Health Blog

August 16, 2018

By Sharon Levy, MD, MPH, Contributor, and

Siva Sundaram, BA, Contributor

TIPS on How to Talk with Your Children About Substances and Gambling Part 3

Over the next 5 weeks we are going to be posting 1 tip a week on how to discuss substance use and gambling with your kids.

Tip # 3 “Why Your Child Might Be Experimenting”.  ***

Teens may make high-risk decisions to help them cope with something. In this present climate of COVID-19, along with the “normal” changes that happen as teens develop; it is expected that anxiety, stress, unpleasant emotions, or inability to connect socially with peers could cause them to explore ways to meet this need. As a result, teens may look to drinking, trying drugs, or gambling as a solution to what they believe to be an “unmet” need. As a parent, it is important to be aware that being curious about those reasons can help him or her feel less judged. This is by no means a time to give permission to continue, but it may also offer you a window into your teen’s underlying struggles. It may help them develop insight into their own behavior, or possibly point to problems that may need professional support. Conversely, these are conversations that can be challenging for a parent to have with a child. Some young people have limited understanding as to why they engage in high-risk behaviors. For students who engage in these behaviors regularly, we recommend an assessment by a professional who can support them in behavior change.

Seek to Understand

Please come back next week for tip #4 in talking with your children which is, “How To Intervene”

***Harvard Health Blog

August 16, 2018

By Sharon Levy, MD, MPH, Contributor, and

Siva Sundaram, BA, Contributor

TIPS on How to Talk with Your Children About Substances and Gambling Part 2

Over the next 5 weeks we are going to be posting 1 tip a week on how to discuss substance use and gambling with your kids

Tip #2 Ask and Listen, But Really Listen.  ***

It is natural when we see our children heading down a path filled with risk to jump into action and manage their choices. We want to prevent them from making similar mistakes that we have made or that we have witnessed.  However, research indicates that for a concept to truly be grasped a person must discover the information for themselves. This is not to say, let you children do whatever they want- however many times we lecture our children rather than listen to them. Perhaps a non-judgmental, open-ended question is a way to begin that conversation. “What do you know about Gambling?” or “Marijuana is now legal for people over 21, how do you feel about that?”. Children who feel like they are being heard are more apt to participate in a conversation. When your child responds, utilize reflective statements such as repeat back to them what you heard. Also consider asking questions that are not yes or no.  For example: “So you have heard that vaping is safer than cigarettes, do you think that is true?” The goal here is not to let you children do whatever they want with no consequence. It is to ensure that they feel heard and valued.

Resist the Urge to Lecture

Please come back next week for tip #3 in talking with your children which is, “Why Your Child Might Be Experimenting”

***Harvard Health Blog

August 16, 2018

By Sharon Levy, MD, MPH, Contributor, and

Siva Sundaram, BA, Contributor

TIPs on How to Talk with Your Children About Substances

Over the next 5 weeks we are going to be posting 1 tip a week on how to discuss substance use and gambling with your kids. ***

Tip #1 - Be Clear In Your Expectations. 

It is crucial to be clear in what the expectations are for your children. Statements like “be smart” can be left up to interpretation. If your expectations or values are for your kids not to use substances, be direct in how you talk to them. Clearly lay out what you desire and what you expect from them. Be specific, using a statement like, “If you go out with your friends please don’t drink or ride with anyone that has been drinking or using drugs”.

Clarity is always key.

Please come back next week for tip #2 in talking with your children which is Ask and Listen, But Really Listen.”

***

Harvard Health Blog

August 16, 2018

By Sharon Levy, MD, MPH, Contributor, and

Siva Sundaram, BA, Contributor