Over the next 5 weeks we are going to be posting 1 tip a week on how to discuss substance use and gambling with your kids

Tip #2 Ask and Listen, But Really Listen. ***

It is natural when we see our children heading down a path filled with risk to jump into action and manage their choices. We want to prevent them from making similar mistakes that we have made or that we have witnessed. However, research indicates that for a concept to truly be grasped a person must discover the information for themselves. This is not to say, let you children do whatever they want- however many times we lecture our children rather than listen to them. Perhaps a non-judgmental, open-ended question is a way to begin that conversation. “What do you know about Gambling?” or “Marijuana is now legal for people over 21, how do you feel about that?”. Children who feel like they are being heard are more apt to participate in a conversation. When your child responds, utilize reflective statements such as repeat back to them what you heard. Also consider asking questions that are not yes or no. For example: “So you have heard that vaping is safer than cigarettes, do you think that is true?” The goal here is not to let you children do whatever they want with no consequence. It is to ensure that they feel heard and valued.

Resist the Urge to Lecture

Please come back next week for tip #3 in talking with your children which is, “Why Your Child Might Be Experimenting”

***Harvard Health Blog

August 16, 2018

By Sharon Levy, MD, MPH, Contributor, and

Siva Sundaram, BA, Contributor